NOTE: This post is sort of a rant and a long one at that. For the sake of all of you who have better things to read, I'm including some random eye candy that you should feel free to look at instead.
Recently, Annie posted about needing to take a little breather from teaching after an unpleasant email. I wanted to write her and tell her not to take it personally but I can't because I would have responded the same way. It seemed like such eerie timing because I recently received a rather terse string of emails from someone working on one of my patterns that gave me that same sort of feeling about designing. No, I'm not hanging up my knitting needles and Excel spreadsheets, but it was still one of those interactions that made me feel like "why bother?"
The thing is, I'm not upset with the individual. In fact, I totally understand how frustrating it is to have a problem with a pattern. And honestly, if I'm truthful with myself, I'd much rather someone contacted me directly for help (even if they are furious) and actually let me know there's a problem than just throw up her hands and write off the pattern and me altogether.
The email started with a subject line that said that a particular pattern of mine had "major problems." This is a pattern that quite a few people have knit and that is distributed through a third party who had employed sample knitters, tech editors and copy editors. While I know that's no promise of an error free pattern, it was surprising to hear that a major error (that is, one that would prevent an average knitter from completing the garment) slipped through and that no one had noticed it yet.
The email went on to say that I needed to review my calculations (no indication as to where the problem was) and that she had asked several others who are mathematically inclined, to review it and had determined that my pattern was indeed wrong. She closed by commenting that she now considered this an indicator of the overall quality of my patterns, in general and that I would not be purchasing another pattern I had designed.
I don't know if this person reads my blogs. She has never commented before, though she has sent me an email about a broken link so she might stumble on this post, and I honestly wouldn't want her to think that I hold any ill will. It's always useful to get feedback, but of all the challenges I face with doing knitwear design, this is the one most likely to send me into hibernation and why I don't produce as many patterns as I might otherwise be inclined to write.
I wrote her back and said that quite a few other people had knit the pattern without issue so I wondered if it was more that the instructions were unclear instead of being completely wrong and could she direct me the part of the pattern giving her a problem. I also said that should we find an error, I wanted to make sure we got an errata posted, so I was including the 3rd party publisher in our conversation.
After some back and forth, I realized that in tech editing, an extra row had been added for some sizes, to have everyone working on the same side of the garment, which meant that an extra couple stitches were increased. Additionally one of the instructions could be misinterpreted to indicate that fewer rows should be worked. I let her know my findings and that, if she had gotten to that point, it should simply require her to keep working in pattern, no ripping should be required beyond a single row, at worst. I provided the mathematical equations that would verify my results and I thought we were in good shape.
And yet, this still didn't sit well and she let me know that the people who checked the pattern can do calculus and she expected me to change the pattern.
*sigh*
I can't do calculus, but that's OK, because the pattern doesn't require it. Instead, I wrote out, for each of the 35 rows in question, how many stitches you have to start, how many are added on that row and how many stitches you have at the end of that row, which showed that the pattern calculations were indeed accurate minus the one extra row.
At this point, I have spent several hours reviewing, calculating and writing out explanations. At her request, I've also offered some modification advice and suggestions on choosing a successful yarn. All the while, I feel like I'm being chastised and demeaned for what amounted to a very minor error that resulted from a group effort to try to make the pattern as succinct and clear as possible, and after spending the time to walk this person through the issue I got...
...nada.
No "thank you," no "oh I see." Nada. Not even a confirmation that the last email satisfied her expectations. In fact, it's simply not clear if I have been able to effectively communicate the instructions or if she has simply given up.
Designing can be a very time consuming process and even though some of my patterns are more expensive than others out there, I don't even come close to making minimum wage on the hours I put in. This piece is absolutely no exception and spending hours over the weekend trying to provide good customer support while feeling chastised sometimes makes me question the effort that goes into producing patterns. When I write patterns, I agonize over every detail, trying to provide a huge number of sizes, clear illustrations and thorough instructions. Writing the pattern sometimes takes as long or longer than knitting the sample. For the most part, people are hugely supportive and I have great interactions with people who have knit both my for-sale and free patterns, but email interactions like the one I had this weekend do happen and they take a bit of the wind out of my sails.
When patterns are distributed in books, fliers, calendars, magazines or other printed formats, space is expensive and the parties involved work to take what (at least in my case) begin as insanely verbose and convoluted instructions and distill them down to the least possible instructions to cover the greatest possible information. In that effort, some information may be misinterpreted or become confusing. I don't think there's a designer out there who wants those oversights to go on unreported, but if you are going to contact the designer, could I suggest that you approach the subject by giving them the benefit of the doubt? And if the designer spends time helping you and provides the information that you need to move forward, go ahead and send them a thank you. It's totally free and makes the effort seem far more worthwhile. Frankly, I suspect I'm preaching to the choir. The folks who come 'round to my blog seem like just a great group of people, but I'm venting, you know, poooor me.
Anyway, I know that for every angry letter I get, there are tons of people who are totally satisfied with their purchase and that's what's so fantastic about being able to design. It's incredibly gratifying to have someone knit your vision, and ultimately, a few unpleasant conversations aren't going to ruin what is a fun pastime for me. But I do feel it's necessary, sometimes, to remind people that the folks behind the patterns are just human and fallible. The time they spend helping you is not paid time, they are helping you because they want you to be happy with your purchase. If Vogue Knitting and Interweave Knits gets to have errata pages then we small indy designers should be granted a little leeway too.
Ok, rant over. Thanks goodness for dogs and flowers.
I've gotten a lot of weird e-mail flak from the DNA scarf pattern in the (omg) almost 9 years since I posted it. (And the one person who reported a true mistake was a real lady about letting me know about it.) People who can't read charts and/or can't cross cables expect me to... I don't know, do something about it. Yeah. Sure. I also occasionally get weird demands from people who want to learn to spin better - they want my results without putting in the time, effort, and practice - what am I supposed to do? Mind meld and skill transfer?
Anyway, some people are too proud to admit when they made a mistake, others are just jerks. I think you did all that you reasonably and responsibly could do, so leave it at that and move on.
Well, crap. I've no doubt your regular readers would be willing to collectively go out and rough someone up over their mistreatment of you ;-Þ .....(JUST KIDDING, lady who complained, if you're reading this comment), but as you said, Marnie, we (your readers) are the choir.
I know you needed to vent, and, as one of your readers, I'm perfectly willing to read as you do. With venting now over, consider, though, that there are some people in the world who simply cannot be pleased. If someone starts shooting off insults right off the bat, rather than first diplomatically presenting a problem and a need to you, I'd say, they're one of those people. Nice people (and you're one of them) shouldn't let unhappy and miserable people (and what else would cause a person to behave so rudely as she did?) dictate to them their worth as designer, or as a person. She is but a drop of vinegar in a sea of kindness. Don't assign her more worth than she deserves.
PS- The flowers are beautiful, and I love seeing the happy girls at play. ;-)
I'm sorry that this experience has happened to you, but I'm glad that it hasn't put you off designing.
I had cause to email a designer about what I thoughts was an error with a free pattern (this was early on in my knitting and I didn't know about forums and the like). It turned out that it was totally my mistake and it was because of my apparent inability to count stitches, but in my email I was polite to the designer and received a nice reply in return. Once my error had been pointed out, I quickly replied to apologise and finished the item without any further problems!
The rant is fine. I can totally understand your feelings. I have struggled with finding the will to design some days when i get insulted for something. I probably will face more once my patterns start going live, so I am making my padding extra thick and keeping the sweetness in stock.
You sounded like you went above and beyond what was called for and you did a great job. I am sorry that the other person did not have the consideration to think of the time you spent solving the "major" problem.
Sigh, some people have crazy expectations. I have to say though that the polite emails I receive get answered way faster and more helpfully than the grumpy ones. Mainly because I need to delay replying to the grumpy ones long enough to make sure I don't send an angry reply!
It's hard not to internalize (read taking personally) this kind of thing, but objectively, I can say that you did absolutely everything to make this customer happy. If she's not gracious enough to appreciate it, that's her problem :-).
I can't say that I know what you're going through, but as a consumer I have the utmost respect for all of you designers. Your "rant" only reminds me how grateful I am that there are talented people like you who are willing to do the math (something I'm horrible at) to share their designs in multiple sizes. So please, don't stop. :)
And also - how do the pups like those sweet potato treats? I saw them at Nature's Pet and thought about getting them for my dogs, but they were really spendy ('cmon, it's just a dried vegetable!). Are they worth it?
I'm sorry someone gave you such a hard time with one of your patterns, and then to not even be civil enough to say thanks for fixing the "problem"! But it was a good excuse to look at your beautiful garden, and charming girls. Now if only you could have snapped a shot with the pups and garden in the together. Black and white verus a frenzy of color - spectacular!
yes indeed to " If Vogue Knitting and Interweave Knits gets to have errata pages then we small indy designers should be granted a little leeway too."
My greatest fear with my first published design would be math errors, uck. I hate math. I wrote a particular non-indue pattern/yarn company regarding a very large mistake in a pattern and along with that mistake I asked why when they said "increase 20 stitches evenly across", I asked why didn't they just go ahead and say how instead of requiring me to do math (there was loads of empty space on the page, I swear!) the person replied that people who knit there patterns know how to figure that out on there own. I was smack dot in the middle of their demographic and they couldn't have been more wrong. Because of that response, I will never ever again buy a pattern from them. But I feel like they didn't at all try to help me, and they confirmed there was an error in the math but never told me what the right math was, said they would get back to me and never did. It sounds like you went well out of your way, and you have a LOT of patience! E-mail is an easy place to take things the wrong way or get irate. It's so hard to read tone in an e-mail, it's all up for interpretation.
Sorry it got you down, but just know you did more for that one person then that "big" company did for me. Sometimes I think the indie designers are way more helpful, I've gotten wonderful fast responses from chicknits, and knit'n'tonic in the past, far better then any of the big companies. Sounds like you handled it really well and I hope you know that with CONFIDENCE!
oh dang there - their in several places, gah
I'm sorry, that's really lousy. I am always massively impressed by the amount of effort that independent, largely web-based designers such as you put into their patterns in terms of an enormous range of sizes, clear instructions, etc. It sounds to me like you are doing your absolute best to ensure the quality of your patterns and that's all anyone can reasonably expect. Keep it up, really : )
"And yet, this still didn't sit well and she let me know that the people who checked the pattern can do calculus and she expected me to change the pattern ... I can't do calculus, but that's OK, because the pattern doesn't require it."
Calculus has nothing to do with figuring increases and decreases in knitting instructions, absolutely nothing. That certainly wasn't necessary for her to say! That there was full of snark and snobbery, like using a wrecking ball to push a thumbtack into corkboard. Your patterns are just beautiful, Marnie, and that they require something mundane like "decrease 5 over 6 inches" and aren't actually sculpted from cotton candy and cast in liquid gold still amazes me.
Even though I've never ordered one of your patterns, I always appreciate seeing the photos on your blog and reading about your process. I think you're a very talented designer. Keep up the good work and try to ignore the negativity!!!
Tell me who she is and I'll take care of her for you.
My insurance lady views her clients like a garden. Some are flowers and some weeds. For some reason, I'm think that woman is a weed.
I'm sorry that you had to deal with that crankypants, Marnie. Please don't let her get to you. Just think of all the people who are happy with your patterns and try to forget that dreadful woman.
I used to work at a store well-known for their customer service which was great because you had support for doing whatever you needed to end the conversation with the person still a customer. However, even with the policy of 'make it right, even if it wasn't our mistake', it amazed me how devoted some people were to their ire. And I noticed that the most unreasonable people were the ones who had contributed to the error. Those who had been wronged by the store or a third party were usually nice (or quickly became so when they saw we wanted fix the problem) and always expressed appreciation.
One wonders, did the emailer indicate whether those calculus knowers also knew knitting?
Given the level of support that you have provided for the knitter in question, I say you have done more than enough. If she cannot see past the extra row and appreciate the row by row + stitch count instructions that you have provided thus far, then @#!%... You can't win them all.
What does calculus have to do with knitting anyway? Did she actually try to figure the area under a curve or something? And even if she did calculus, she probably just over-thought the probem and made it more complicated than it should be.
I say ignore and move on. You've got much better things to think about anyway.
Thanks for sharing this Marnie. It's something all designers will/do deal with at some point and it's helpful to know how you went about it. It does suck though...especially when you give so much to the knitting community with all your free tutorials and patterns....please don't stop because of this!!
OMG, I don't even know what to say. I mean, I have a LOT to say, but it wouldn't be kind to the complainer in question. ;) I'd say you went above and beyond to try to help her. She may just be one of those people who are impossible to satisfy. In any case, I'm so sorry you had to endure that booey. I know what you go through in putting your patterns together - if anyone thinks you do it haphazzardly, they are cookoo. Try to let it pass and continue with your fabulous designs! xo-S.
"send them a thank you. It's totally free and makes the effort seem far more worthwhile." So true, Marnie.
I was just thinking independant designers this morning. I was looking at patterns on Ravelry and saw that the designers get most of the profits (95%? I think) and was thinking that the cost could hardly cover the hours it takes for a designer to put a pattern together. Especially your patterns. I know you guys do it because you love it and we love your patterns. Sorry about the cranky emailer but she is far outnumbered with those of us who love you :)
Don'tcha know I have had a few of those exchanges, myself. Some people just don't get it.
Wow dude. What a pain in the ass. I don't mean her personally (or do I?) but the situation - buttpain for real. For my part, I can say that I was really impressed with the amount of time you put in with me on my Bellocqs, and I don't recall even requiring calculus in the communication - I can't believe someone would fail to acknowledge your efforts, especially if they're that extensive.
I think I'm okay with not that many people having knit my patterns now. :-)
such a shame, Marnie! sending hugs your way.
sometimes it helps to write it all out; puts it in perspective for you. then you can put it behind you, fully thought out.
you summed up nicely,"Anyway, I know that for every angry letter I get, there are tons of people who are totally satisfied with their purchase..."
that's true! keep a good thought and have a good evening!
Thanks for posting about this. I've had some similar thoughts lately - there have been a couple of complaints about my first published pattern (more about design choices than about technical aspects, but I'm always worried about that too). In working on a new project, I keep thinking about the grief I might receive for any little choice or flub or oversight I make and whether I should change the design because of these hypotheticals - sort of ruins the creative process, I think!
No easy answer - I guess you just have to weigh the costs and benefits of write-up for each piece you design - but I hope it continues to be worth it for you!
Wow. I can do calculus, or at least I could. But uh, wtf does that have to do with knitting? ~_^ Maybe some of the factorial stuff could be used for increases, but that's a tenuous associationg, at best.
In situations such as this, where it's a pattern that has been published by someone other than you, can you refer the person back to the publisher? Or is it part of the publishing contract that you provide any and all uhm, troubleshooting?
Such a bummer! Everybody's already said what I would say about the matter, so I'll just say thank you for reminding me I should start looking for a kiddie pool for the kids! ;)
And hooray for Pandabutt!
bummer! but i had to smile because as i read through the sad story my eyes were delighted by all the photographs.
even when you rant you are thinking of your customer/reader/and friends happiness. you are so sweet!! don't let this drag you down too far.
It amazes me that SOME people take a FUN activity like knitting and make it miserable. It just seems to be the way that some people are built. Please don't let miserable people stop you from doing something that you are so talented at and obviously enjoy. It just seems to me that people need to lighten up in general.
As you know, another big hobby of mine (next to knitting, spinning and dyeing) is dog agility training. It simply stupifies (is that a word?) me that people are all set to spend their entire weekend at an agility trial in misery.
This past weekend I had a "major" job (volunteer I might add) at a USDAA trial in my area. To compete in this "sport" we have to get up waaaay before the sun, pack our cars with more stuff that you can imagine, errect tents and help with heavy equipment, and spend all day in a variety of weather situations. It takes dedication, but even after all of the negative aspects, it's a weekend that we get to spend hanging out with our precious dogs. Plus, if we do it right, we get some ribbons and bragging rights at the end.
This past weekend, after repeated crazy people saying the most ridiculous things to me while I was trying to do my volunteer job, I felt the need to say outloud "I refuse to get upset this weekend. I am determined to have fun, and anyone who wants to join me can come along for the fun, but no one is going to bring me down." After saying that, several people laughed, but it just kinda put my attitude out there and let them know that I was not going to subscribe to their negativity.
I'm telling you this long-winded story to let you know that you cannot possibly please all of the people all of the time, so edit the nuts right out of your mind. Go on doing your thing and don't worry about the rest. That's my advice.
I want to pass some doggie info on that I just learned this year and I know you'd want to know too. This is not criticism, but just a heads-up that I know you'd want to know. I noticed in one of the photos of Panda and Thea that you had ice in their water. I think all dog owners do this (including myself for many years), but I was just made aware a couple of months ago that ice cubes and ice water can cause bloat. It was described to me that it causes the type of reaction that a human would get if they were to jump into really cold water. I thought you'd want to know. You can learn more about it here:
http://dogblog.dogster.com/2007/08/09/ice-causes-bloat/
Knit/design in peace and don't let the turkeys get you down!
Woof!
Terry
This person was needlessly rude to you from the very beginning. Yes, it's frustrating to have difficulty with a pattern, but thank goodness most knitters are polite with their questions! I'm willing to bet that she is no picnic to live with, so just be happy that you only know her through email!
I think that kind of thing goes on in all aspects - we had one of our knitting tools, ripped apart, and redesigned by a woman who was convinced we "made it wrong". Very fustrating and disheartening until we took a good look around at all the positive feedback we had already received and said "Wait a Minute"! Is is possible it really is her issue and not our design? Turns out - it was. Things like that have a way of making us doubt our abilities, our craft, our creativity. It's at those times that we have to take a better look around and see that one bad response isn't the whole and work past it.
Marnie, I am sorry you had this encounter with a rude knitter. Although I have never met you in person or made any of your patterns (they are in my queue though...), I truly enjoy your blog. Any time I have an issue with a pattern, I just try and try again figuring it was my mistake so I think it's amazing you went out of your way to help this person out. Too bad it was not appreciated.
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Post edited.
I don't think this is a good place to discuss the merits of other knitting professionals, and I'd like to try to keep things pretty positive here. ~m
I'm sorry I can't believe that a fellow knitters could be so rude. I've had problems with patterns before(not yours) but its been fun to email knitters that I have found on blogs that have made the same thing and ask for help. It seems that someone is always willing help out!
Sharing creations, be they lessons to students or patterns, ideas or hand knitting, a home cooked meal or anyting else is really giving of oneself.
The nastiness some people carry around with them essentially disables them to being able to give anything - even a bit of common courtesy.
I sense that one of the magical things about the knitting community is that these kind of emotionally "disabled" people are in the vast minority hence when they assert their misery they really stick out, especially in a community that is generally giving to others all the time!
I read Annie's post last night but was so exhausted from spending three days with just such a negative person I literally had nothing left with which to post a supportive comment!
Thanks for the reminder this morning that I must head back to her blog and remedy that!
I occasionally find errors in patterns, both free ones and patterns I've bought. Sometimes the corrections are attached, sometimes they come later and sometimes not at all. We are all human! It happens--we make mistakes. I just don't see why anyone would get so out of sorts over something like that. What has happened to innovation, I mean get busy lady and find a way to alter the pattern and make it work!
Something like this would upset me too, but I can tell you Marnie, your patterns are some of the best I've used! When I finish a project and say to myself, "Wow that was a fun knit" it often has been one of your patterns (especially hats). Bless you Marnie and your little dogs too!
Marnie,
I've got to get the kiddos off to school, so I haven't gotten to read all of the comments left before me, and this might have been said before.
Some people have no idea how to approach something like this with panache. They have no other way to be except "nasty." It sounds like this person had an incredibly frustrating experience, and then just went off on you. Lovely. I'm so sorry that there are ugly people out there. They can really ruin a person's confidence. Get on the phone and talk to our friend Kristi.
Anyway, just thinking of you, and thanking you for all of your beautiful designs and all the posts of your dogs on the beach. I miss San Diego and Dog Beach with Missy. So, your posts really make my day....
Hope this made sense. Now, off to deal with the kids!
I'm sorry for this experience. I always have this fear when I teach a new pattern. Even though it is has been cross tested at least 10 times, I'm always afraid I missed something. And then it seems any pattern can be interpreted totally differently then I intended.
I feel you should have been given much more slack and at the very least a thanks for trying to work with the person on the problem. You bent over backward and provided personal support...on a weekend! You are a compassionate good person and you really did everything you can do in a situation like this. You are an amazing designer! I am always in awe of how beautifully done your patterns are. I for one am greatful that you share these wonderful pieces of your creativity with us. :)
It was fun to read your rant interspersed with the peaceful flowers and cavorting pups.
It's a privilege to be able to e-mail independent designers and receive responses. I've only sent fan-girl e-mails to designers (they're right there on Ravelry) and your designs are among those I admire. I've made some of your free patterns and they were all well written and easy to follow.
You probably haven't heard back from the disgruntled knitter because she's back to knitting away on the pattern since it's been spelled exactly for her.
THere's no reason to apologize for waht you're feeling - it is completely reasonable. Some people feel the need to act supercilious and degrade others. I always wonder if they know what real friendship is like. You went above and beyond, and absolutely, the very least she could have done is thank you for the time you spent helping her. The VERY least.
I am sorry you had a less than plesant person to deal with. Some people lack the "edit" button in their brains that keep them from acting like an ungrateful jerk. Oh well, as someone who has read your blog for a very long time, both purchaced and enjoyed your free patterns, I can tell you this. They are indeed well written and beautiful. You are a talented designer...and you actually got me to work on lace! I just bought MORE LACE YARN! See? You are talented designer and a bit of a motiational "Tony Robbins" of yarn. ;)
Oh no! That's so frustrating/infuriating! I can't even begin to imagine what designers go through to have their patterns published. Please don't let one person dissuade you from doing something you love! (And we love your patterns too!)
I'm sorry about the hassle and I don't blame you for not wanting to publish another pattern. But it would be such a shame for us because of your great designs. For every one dissatisfied person there's a lot of satisfied people. (Thanks for posting all the eye candy too. You reminded me to pick up a little pool for my pups.)
I feel your pain, cos I've been there. Both as a designer/publisher, and as a yarn shop owner.
I had someone who had bought one of my patterns call me at 3am to yell at me for a mistake in the pattern. I asked her if she knew what time it is? She said yes. I hung up on her.
When I had my yarn shop I had a couple customers who, when ever they 'found' an error in a pattern, would come to the shop and chew me out for it--like I'd put it in there somehow. 9 times out of 10 there was no error. They just didn't read the instructions correctly.
Oops! accidentally hit the post button before I was finished.
What I learned from my experiences is you can't take it personally. There are ALWAYS jerks and unhappy people out there seeking to make us happy people as miserable as they are. I feel sorry for those kind of people. They get pity from me, and a refusal to let them take me down with them. Don't let those bad apples get you down.
You're furkids are adorable.
This reminds me of bug reports I sometimes see in the FOSS world. Someone will have a problem that can't be reproduced by anyone else, yet insist that it's a major flaw in the program. Of course, instead of describing what they did and what happened, the report consists of "it doesn't work."
Few people would go as far as you have to try to satisfy an unreasonable 'end user'.
oh geez. as a consumer, i understand the person's frustration but what i don't understand is the person's rudeness. a thank you in response is always appropriate. always. even if your pattern had a big huge stupid error. i've gone out of my way to explain things, or find things, etc. at the request of a random emailer only to get no thank you in response.
email and the internet have allowed some of us to to forget about common decency.
i used to teach a statistical computing class and there was always one student in the class who was under the impression that any problems they were having in the class was my fault, even if they were the only ones with the problems. we call those "outliers."
I think there are people for whom finding someone else's error -- and bringing it to light -- gives them a rush. They are right, and you are wrong! And you're in the position of authority! Plus they are sparing the untold masses from the horrors of making the same mistake. So they get to feel doubly good. Woo Woo!
I suppose one of the advantages in publishing in a magazine, etc. is that you are more insulated from these direct exchanges. But ask me how many times I have written a snarky response to a snarky email and then gone back and put in, "Thank you for writing to tell me about X. It's so rewarding to hear from people who are using my patterns..." Civility, man. Civilty.
For the record, I took calculus, multivariable calculus, differential equations, math for engineers, math for making your brain crash....and that means nothing when it comes to reading knitting patterns.
I think your title sums it up perfectly - you get more with honey than vinegar. I'm sorry that the emailer was so confrontational and accusatory. You went through alot of effort to help her out - not even counting how much time probably went into designing the pattern.
I love your designs (and your pictures!) - hopefully this doesn't get you down :)
Thank you for sharing your experience with us Marnie. I do not think I would have the patience to deal with people, customers, wanting continual technical support that you deliver! You continue to be a role model for me in how to diplomatically handle challenging interpersonal situations. Oh that sounds super sappy, but its true!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, it is unfortunate that you had this experience and I imagine it was very frustrating. I'm always thrilled when designers take the time to go over something extra or explain a section that I don't really get. There have been a number of times when I've sent the "error" message only to realize it's my error or I hadn't checked the errata carefully, I make sure to always follows those up with a "I'm sorry I'm such an idiot and you really are awesome and thanks for taking the time to explain something to me that my 5 year old could have figured out." Sometimes I wonder if people do kind of suck or if they have lost all concepts of common courtesy or if they are just too preoccupied with their own experience that they don't take the time to think about how someone else feels. I hope it was a freeing experience to able to talk about it and to know that there are plenty of us who love the work you do and appreciate the time you take.
hi missmarnie ~ please try not to be discouraged! you are such a talented designer, and so generous to offer so many patterns for free! i appreciate the time and care you devote to developing the documentation for your patterns. obviously the person who criticized has problems with herself, it's not about you, it never is with people like that. i'm sorry you were on the receiving end of that sad energy. i agree with other readers who said to learn how to recognize the not-ever-satisfied "tone" in the future, and protect yourself from it. take good care of yourself and your creative gift!